【译文一,许渊冲译本】
CATARACT ON MOUNT LU
The sunlit Censer perk exhales a wreath of cloud;
Like an upended stream the cataract sounds loud.
Its torrent dashes down three thousand feet from high;
As if the Silver River fell from azure sky. ●赏析 原诗的第一句中一个“生”字把静止的香炉峰写得富有了灵性。许先生同样一个'exhales'(“散发出”或“呼出”)也将香炉峰人格化了。'awreath
of
cloud'形容“紫烟”,其中名词'wreath'(“花环”),有“缭绕”以及“色彩绚丽”的生动意向。
原诗第二句一个“挂”字,化动为静,呼应上文。而许先生使用动词'unpended'(“被倒置”)来形容远望中的瀑布像“倒挂”的飞流,译出了诗词的弦外之音和意境之美。
第三句中,“飞”和“直下”描绘出瀑布飞散而降的气势。许先生译文中以'dashes
down'作谓语,既合乎主语“倒挂的飞流”飞下的走向,又传达出瀑布凌空而落的气势。
最后一句,许先生用动词'fell',但为虚拟语气,把现实瀑布和想象中的银河自然地联系起来。
四行诗的韵脚比较多,许先生按原诗的节奏,择用aabb尾韵。为了压好韵脚,在诗句的语序方面做了必要的调整。总之,许先生保留了原作的“形美”和“音美”,译品接近原诗的自然节奏。
【译文二,无名氏译本】 Viewing the Waterfall at Mount
Lu
Li Bai
Sunlight streaming on Incense Stone
kindles a violet smoke:
Far off I watch the waterfall
plunge to the long river,
Flying waters descending straight three
thousand feet,
Till I think the Milky Way
has tumbled from the ninth
height of Heaven.
【译文三,无名氏译本】 Under the round golden sun, purple smoke was rising from the temple's incense far away, a splendid waterfall had been hang
on to the mountain across from, flying straight down into the rushing
river 3000 feet below, as the glaxay falling from the mestery
universe on the ninth heaven.